Life skill training is absolutely necessary to lay down great fundamental values in life. They are popular in different forms today – blogs, workshops, podcasts disseminating information on how you can be what you want to be. But when it comes to children, we are distracted by a lot of unnecessary hype that we miss the fundamental skills that children need to thrive. Technical and academic skills are important. But life skills tie them all together to make kids better. Life skills for kids are a necessity just like life skills for adults. In fact, the earlier you start training them, the better. The beauty with skills is that there is no limit to learning them and learning can be fun if approached the right way. You can pick up skills at any point in life and work on it and become better at it. So whatever the age of your child is, make sure you give them the necessary foundation for a great life.
Growing years
The brains of children are like sponges. They readily absorb information throughout their growing years, retain it easily and recollect information when needed almost effortlessly. I particularly mean children of school going age. They are always curious about their surroundings but not cautious enough (partly because their brains are not fully developed). This period is a huge learning curve for any child. At school, they learn a variety of subjects, meet a lot of people, juggle several responsibilities, don different creative hats and bring different levels of energy everyday.
Why are life skills for kids important?
Such a vibrant period can also easily be overwhelming if a definite structure, in terms of a daily, weekly, monthly routine is not devised. So life skills are a way for kids to navigate the multiple roles efficiently without much depletion of their valuable energy. All skills cannot be taught at all ages. For instance, if the child is barely 4 years old, you will not effectively be able to teach them to cook. The child needs to understand what fire and food is, in order to try cooking. So skill training should be age appropriate. This article will help you understand some of the vital skills needed for kids. The responsibility of making it appropriate to the children lies with the parents. Before delving in, here a some tips to keep in mind.
Few things to remember
Start as early as possible
There is no right age to start incorporating life skills. Children as early as 3 or 4 years are capable of listening well to parents and understanding what they say. So start as early as possible. Assign them simple tasks and see to it that they complete it.
Talk them through it
Children always want to know the whys and hows of our world. So explain to them in a broad language, what life skills for kids are and why are they important. Encourage them to ask questions or seek clarifications with you whenever they need to. I use a lot of moral stories to reinforce the theories learnt. Story telling is a great way to drive a point home.
Be consistent
Things won’t work out in a day or even a few weeks. It takes a long time to master one skill. Be consistent with your parental guidance and support. This will help the children believe in the significance of life skills. Everything starts with belief.
Expect disruptions
We all like to be the ‘perfect mommies and daddies’ for our children. But just like the idea of ‘perfect parents’, the idea of ‘perfect children’ is also a myth. There will be days when the cloud between you and your child is so dense that you struggle to get through to them. Those days, your routine and discipline will be tested. The best way to handle it, is to be prepared. Set reasonable expectations for yourself and your child. Forgive small mistakes and move on. Most importantly learn from experience.
Be willing to make small adjustments
When you go in with a plan, your child may suggest or negotiate the same plan in a slightly different manner. Unless it is a fundamental change questioning the very purpose of the exercise, leave room for small adjustments. This helps the child feel heard. Naturally this will lead to more cooperation from their end.
Be empathetic
A child can have a bad day and throw totally unrelated tantrums at home. This does not necessarily mean something at home has to change. Sometimes the reasons could be as varied as
- Not qualifying for the school team
- Academic difficulty
- Fight with friends
- Being scolded by the teacher
All these are directly not related to the tantrum at home. The tantrum happens because, the child believes a proper home to be a safe space for letting go of emotions. So it is essential to be empathetic to the child’s needs.
Be patient
Honestly, it takes months of practice before you can see visible changes in the demeanour and habits of your child. Patience is key. Teaching and learning is a slow but sure process. Give room for maladjustments and mistakes. It is all part of learning life skills. Help them approach you in case of any mental blocks.
In no particular order, these are some significant life skills for kids. Children who are very good at a majority of these skills become intelligent, independent, have an easy childhood and grow into fully functioning adults.
Life skills for kids
Waking up early
Big successes often are the products of small consistent habits. Waking up early, though seems like such a trivial thing, is the reason why so many successful people create extra time for themselves everyday. Imagine your child gaining just 30 mins everyday in the morning. Do the math for a week, month and a year. That is how much time your child will have for their interests.
Eating well
Help them cultivate healthy eating habits even from a young age. This is one of the biggest life skills for kids along with good sleep patterns. Here are some ways to remind them:
- Do not skip breakfast
- Take time to chew your food well
- Eat a variety of foods for balanced nutrition.
- Do not watch TV while eating.
- Stick to regular meal times.
- Avoid lots of junk food and outside food in general.
Sleeping patterns
Encourage kids to develop good sleep time routine like brushing teeth and going to bed on time. Children need longer hours of sleep than adults. Good sleep refreshes their body and mind. Never compromise on sleep. It will directly impact their performance at school.
Discipline and focus
Discipline is the ability to do their work even when they don’t feel like doing it. Focus is the concentration on what they need to do without giving in to distractions. These are invaluable skills to have. It eliminates the stress of competition and can help the child achieve their goals on time.
Chores
To foster responsibility and accountability, there is no better training that assigning them simple household chores. Responsibility teaches them to do a task well and see it to the end. Where as accountability gives them a feeling of being in-charge of the assigned responsibility. Both are invaluable skills as adults.
Cleanliness
Teach kids to keep themselves and their surroundings clean. A clean workstation or a house gives a sense of peace and control of your own space. It manifests positive energy. Teach them to de-clutter their wardrobes and bookshelves. It improves their organisation skill. They will not waste time looking for things at the last minute when they know to organize and take care of their belongings.
Mindfulness
Kids should learn to be aware of themselves and their surroundings. Don’t encourage distractions like using earbuds in public places, phones at all times, mindless scrolling on social media. It is detrimental to their health and well-being. Instead draw clear boundaries and when and how to use them. Never allow phones to be their emotional pacifiers. Let them feel what they have to and work through their feelings. Tucking feelings away will not make them go away.
Time management
Schools normally assign a variety of tasks each day. Unless children learn to manage their time well, they will never be able to stay on top of their tasks. Help them prepare a timetable at home and hold them responsible for it. Allocate a study time, play time, bed time schedule. In case they procrastinate and are in a hurry to finish work on Monday morning, let them be. Do not encourage such behaviours by helping them at the last minute. Parents are obsessive and even more competitive when it comes to their child’s performance at school. But if you do not let them develop a sense of agency when they are young, they will never learn to take control of their lives.
Handling money
Money is a much needed commodity for all and the discipline with regards to money has to start young. Be it in Govt savings scheme or piggy bank savings, children should learn how savings will literally do what it says – Save you from doom! Among the life skills for kids, I find this to be a much overlooked skill. Parents either do not care much about educating children about money (by spending lavishly) or hold price higher than value of a thing (price is what you pay, value is what you get). Both are not healthy patterns. Here are some simple approaches:
- Get your child a piggy bank. It will teach them to save
- For all special occasions, encourage them to donate to someone less previliged than them. It will keep them grounded.
- Send them for grocery shopping regularly. They will become comfortable dealing with money calculations.
- Limit their spending within their savings at the early stage. They will understand the concept of affordability.
- Always teach them the value of material things than their mere price.
- Discuss ‘simple finance’ and the ‘compound effect’ at home, so that they learn relevant concepts.
Socializing
The easiest way to teach this skill is to let them play. Play has innumerable benefits and teaches a lot of skills simultaneously. Some of the vital skills are
- Communication
- Decision making
- Problem solving
- Co-operation
- Leadership
- Conflict resolution
Children who spend at least 30 mins per day playing fare far better on the social scale than children who do not play. Of course play has to be healthy, age-appropriate, non-digital and balanced with the rest of the work. But to eliminate play or substitute it with completely digital games is to eradicate a host of life skills altogether.
Gratitude
Gratitude is bringing your attention to the abundance in life. Children should not be allowed to take all the love and luxury in their homes for granted. That is why gratitude practice is important. It teaches them what are the most valuable things in life and how to stay grounded in family values. Some say grace, some do it through meditation and yet some through daily reminders. Choose what works for you and your child.
Reading
Just reading two pages of a book a day is enough to see children blossom as they age. They are more knowledgeable, more patient, listen more and treat other children well because books teach loads of fundamental life skills for kids in a fun way. Books encourage creativity and imagination along with building strong language and vocabulary. So give them access to great books and see their worlds change before your very eyes.
Conclusion
Parents have to remember that children learn a lot through imitation. What does this mean? This means they will mirror your behaviour more than listen to good behaviour sermons. So the simplest way to bringing up good children is to have discipline and consistency as a parent. Kids don’t expect a parent who does not make any mistakes. Rather they need to know that their parents are trying! Trying to be good, trying to be there for them, trying to make the most of their resources, trying to build a better family – this will automatically teach the kids to try harder to be better.
Do you think other skills can be included in this list? Let us know in the comments.
